This is true to an extent, we all have blind spots. If I have a certain thought pattern that is hindering my relationship with others and God and you help me to see it in a way that empowers me to make a change, I am benefited.
Usually though, criticism is aimed at outward performance rather than the thoughts. Outward performance is only the expression of thoughts and if a person is unaware of the thoughts that are leading to the problem, they really do not have the tools they need to help themselves. So when you point something out, it leads to condemnation and shame, rather than joy and freedom. Most people are already painfully aware of the places where they are cracked and are already giving themselves enough shame over it.
I have struggled with social anxiety all my life. As a child I hid in the school bathrooms to read rather than go outside for recess. Social things like baby showers or even staying for a potluck meal after church were difficult for me. They were difficult for me going into this church, but I really tried in the beginning. Because I do know that you can't always allow yourself to be ruled by your feelings, and I wanted my family to have this church life that was being held out to us. My kids wanted the friends, I felt like God wanted me to try, I really did try.
But the longer we were there, the worse things got. Our finances got worse and worse, through another member deciding not to pay my husband for a job that took him all summer, (Our busiest time, when we make the most of what we need to make for the year.) mandatory tithing, knocking ourselves out to go to family camp, I really couldn't afford baby and wedding shower gifts too. As we went on it got worse and worse. I was exhausted, constantly pregnant, trying to keep up with homeschooling, I just couldn't keep up with what I felt like was expected.
I may have been sensitive. Toward the end I was getting pretty damn sensitive. But there was baby showers, wedding showers, the community meal every week after church, and then the community groups started becoming more and more of an issue. Preached about every week. Things people said in those community groups was reported back to the elders. God help you if you said anything objectionable, or if they didn't like the way a group was being handled. They would send out an elder to sit in on the meetings.
This church, that was so into objecting into the government take over in peoples lives-they weren't objecting to that on the basis of people needing to be trusted to guide their own lives-they objected to the government running it because they thought the church should be what was running your life. And from the way I saw how it was run by these "Spirit filled leaders"--- I'll take the government.
I'll have to finish this later....
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